Waiting

Well, you would never guess it based on what I have, or I guess in this case, haven’t been blogging about…but I am 40 weeks and 4 days pregnant with Baby #2!

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I basically haven’t blogged since I found out we were expecting our Sweet Baby B. Who, by the way, is a girl! For a long time I didn’t post anything because the only thing I wanted to write about was my pregnancy, which we didn’t announce until much later…and then it was just a long, boring winter so I didn’t feel like I had anything to talk about.

Since February, our lives went into overdrive for awhile. We bought a house, but have been remodeling and didn’t move in until April. Since then, it’s been a flurry of unpacking and trying to settle into some kind of routine before the baby arrives.

Now, we are waiting. Waiting for our sweet little girl to arrive!

I wish I could say this pregnancy has been completely joyful for me, but it hasn’t. Don’t get me wrong…we planned, and were thrilled to find out we were expecting again. What caught me off guard was how emotional I have been about how adding another child to the mix would change my relationship with Elias.

I ADORE my son and feel so incredibly blessed that I get to spend almost every day, all day with him. I get to kiss and hug him as much as I want, and cherish every little piece of his personality without distraction. I am all his, and he is all mine…and it makes me sad that our relationship is going to change.

I’m going to be tired, and I don’t want that to effect what I am able to do for him.
I’m going to be preoccupied, and I don’t want to lose sight of his growth.
I’m going to fall in love again, and I don’t want that to change how I express my love for him.
I’m going to be busy, and I don’t want to forget to set aside special time for just the two of us.

…and the list of things I have mourned goes on. Of course, I also know that having a sibling will be GREAT for Elias in so many ways. But to be truly honest, it’s taken my awhile to recognize and accept the many positive aspects that come with expanding our family because I was so wrapped up in the differences. Change has always been difficult for me. Especially when I feel like it effects such an important, and intimate part of my life.

With that said, I have come to peace with the adjustments that are going to take place in our lives, and I am truly beyond excited to meet our little Baby B. As fun as I think it would have been for Elias to have a brother so close in age, I am actually so incredibly thankful we are having a girl. I know that no child is the same, but I think having children of opposite genders will allow me to full appreciate each of them for exactly who they are.

The Never Ending Search for Housing…

When we decided to move to North Dakota, I was sad to leave our first home behind, but also slightly excited for a fresh start.

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Our home in Minnesota was built in the 40’s and although I LOVED the character, some of the spaces were less than ideal and starting to feel small. In effort to be happy about uprooting my life/family, and moving to a new state I was starting to dream about a new home that I could put my stamp on. However, I knew the potential upgrade was going to come at a cost because housing is limited and VERY expensive in North Dakota.

I can’t even tell you how many homes we have looked at so far. Most of what we have seen has been new construction because anything older and slightly more affordable gets snapped up within days. I like the idea of owning a new home, but everything we have looked at so far has been very generic. If you have seen one home, it seems as if you have seen them all.

Despite the tight market, we have actually had offers in on two different homes. The first was a house built in 2010. I loved the layout, and that is was newer but not brand new so there had been time to work out any kinks that might be present. The the kitchen didn’t have as much counter space as I would have liked, but it has a dishwasher! The yard was also small, and there were rental units on each end of the block…but is was close to an elementary school, and it was by far the best thing we had seen so far.

Unfortunately, after the sellers verbally accepted our offer they decided not to move…so we had to start our search all over again. To complicate things, I wasn’t living in North Dakota yet because we were still in the process of trying to get our house in Minnesota listed and sold.

However, one afternoon, our realtor called Jared and said she was going to be listing a house soon, and wanted him to take a look at it. Of course he didn’t want to go without me, but he didn’t have much of a choice. Thank goodness he did because the house was a great (the pictures don’t do is justice)! Or so we thought…

Jared put an offer in on the house right away, and without me seeing it because our realtor told us that it would sell immediately once it hit the market, and she was right. Because the sellers were also relocating, the house had to technically be listed, and once it was, they got two additional offers within 24 hours. However, the relocation company accepted our offer because we were first, and were willing to pay full price.

I eventually saw the house, and really liked it, but then we got the results of the inspection. The septic system was missing inlet baffles. Now I don’t know much about septic systems, but I DO know they can be very costly to replace. Not only that, but the VA won’t even approve a buyer for financing if there is something wrong with the septic system. To make a long story short…after weeks of getting all sorts of conflicting information and dealing with the sellers very slow-to-respond relocation company, yesterday, we decided to walk away.

The good thing is that the sale was contingent on our approval of the inspection, so we will get our earnest money back. The bad thing is we won’t be moving into a “new” home in a week.

That brings us to today. When the most amazing thing happened.

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Less than 24 hours after we decided to walk away form the house with the bad septic system, our sister-in-law sent us a text message letting us know that the empty lot two houses down from them is now for sale. Which is WEIRD because just two weekends ago when  Jared and I were visiting them, in a joking sort of conversation, we asked about the lot. We want to know who owned it, if they were ever going to build there (because it has sat empty for years), etc. Then, we said if things fell through with the house we had an offer on, that maybe we would have to track down the owner as see if we could buy it from them.

I’m trying not to get my hopes up because I’m not sure if we are in the financial position to even build a house at this point. Nonetheless, we are going to talk to one of the builders Jared works with to get some more information about the buying and building process. If things work out, great. If not, we will both be okay with it. We both trust that God will reveal his plan for us when the time is right. In the meantime, Jared and I have it hard on our hearts to…

PAY OFF MY STUDENT LOANS ASAP!!!!

This plan really isn’t anything new, but we’ve decided that IF we are to continue to live with his parents then I should explore the idea of going back to work so we can try to pay off the remaining $23,000+ of my student loans in the next 6-8 months.

Of course I would much rather stay-at-home with my little man, BUT if working for another year means that we can pay off my loans and free up another $400 a month then I KNOW we will both feel so much better about our financial security. I would rather struggle with the emotions of being a working mom for a year then feeling like we are living paycheck-to-paycheck for the next seven.

We are also contemplating selling our second vehicle. Jared drives a company truck for work all the time, and yesterday, I drove for first time in two weeks. At this point in time we don’t NEED two cars. Even if I went back to work, we would be fine…and since both of our vehicles are paid off, selling one would just put money in our pockets that we can then put towards my loans.

All in all, we have no idea when we will finally be in a home of our own again, or what God has planned for us. We are just trying to remain open to His direction, and until we know where he is pointing us…we are going to put every penny we can towards those nasty loans of mine!

Vacation Spa Day

Today was our last full day of vacation, and Jared surprised me with a few hours at the Pebble Company Spa!

I’ve only been to a spa one other time for a combination birthday/graduation/relax before your big nursing licensing exam, so this was a very special, unexpected treat.

Of course, the budget conscious side of me wanted to exclaim “we can’t afford this!” But I bit my tongue, and decided to let my husband do something nice for me (without giving him grief about it)…and I’m glade I did because fully enjoyed the 180 minutes of blissful relaxation that included a massage, facial, foot refresher and herbal tub soak. Then, when I got back to the cabin, I ate some chocolate, and took a baby-free nap. It was a pretty glorious afternoon.

I’m really sad that we have to leave tomorrow. These past five days have been wonderful, and relaxing. Not only have I enjoyed the time I’ve had with my family, but the beautiful solitude of the North has been incredibly refreshing.

I think I could be really happy living on a lake in the middle-of-nowhere Minnesota because the outdoor activities here are endless, and I always feel my best when I am connected with God’s beautiful creation.

New Space

I blogged for a long time on another site, but awhile ago I got the itch to create a new space…I’m not really sure why, but I think I just wanted to start over. I purchased this new domain at the beginning of the year…and then I let it sit. I guess I wasn’t as ready as I thought I was to make the jump.

I hate change, but the past year has been nothing but a constant flow of hello and goodbyes. I became a Mama, my husband quit his job to be a stay-at-home dad…then he got a new job, so I could be where my heart was- at home with our sweet baby E. Only his new job took us from my home state and family in Minnesota, to his in North Dakota. We sold our first home, and are under contract to buy another…like I said, it’s been nothing but change. So, I figure there will probably be no better time than the present to move on from my old blog to my new.

So welcome to my space. I like to write about my wonderfully ordinary and incredibly blessed life!